Tuesday, June 24, 2014

I just want a chance to be me

   My children (and I) have been a part of Music Together for 7 years. I love it, I know it like the back of my hand. It combines my two loves: music and children. I took a class so I could teach it. I dreamed of teaching as soon as all 3 of my kids returned to school or got close enough that I could figure it out. That would have been this upcoming school year. 
    I had not thought about it in 6 months. Today I get an email letting me know the branch of Music Together that I love and have been attending 6/7 years, is hiring and if interested I should contact them. Talk about being torn. My dream job or homeschool my children. Yes I want to cry. 
    I just want a chance to be me. I never wanted to be super mom...okay well maybe I did, but I want/ed to be more than that. I want to be part of something. I want to do something I enjoy. I want to un-tether myself from my job as a mom and just spend 4 hours a week being a 30-something woman who loves music and children. :(

Monday, June 02, 2014


Signed up for my first 5k since I was in college, a few months ago. I just got the green light a week earlier to run, after having some back problems. 

It was a perfect running day. 60F and slightly overcast. As I drove to the race a bald eagle even cruised above my car for 4-5 car lengths. I felt like this was a good omen.....I was wrong.

I started in the middle of the pack because I don't run 6-7 minute miles like I used to :) that was my first mistake. It was bike path narrow and I had to pass a few hundred people, some who were already walking within the first 1/4 mile. At the 1 mile marker I felt awesome! I was pacing with a few people and then slowly passing them. At about a 1.3 miles running on the street....my bad ankle met a rock. Yes completely random and some kind of cruel joke. I wanted to cry. I wanted someone to come pick me up and give me a ride back. It hurt bad. I sat down for a couple of minutes hoping the pain would slow down so I could limp it in. It didn't. I got tired of sitting, so I walked. 
By the time I got on the grass again a mommy friend who is 8 month pregnant come jogging by. I decided what the hell I can just jog slow because I am feeling pathetic limping along. So I gimped along jogging. I got tired of that so then I said my farewells to the mommy friend and ran it in. The blacktop.....it hurt. Every step on my left foot was felt up to my knee, but only 1 mike to go, and as gimpy as I was, I was still gaining on everyone in front of me. 

I finished in 33 minutes. Not exactly the under 30 I was aiming for. I seriously want a do over. There is another 5k there in August. I am thinking that next time, I need to wrap my ankle and start towards the front more.  

Lessons Learned.